Another defeat - that's going to be the story from now on.
Over the last month or so the amount of sleep I've got out of a painkiller has been falling, either because I was becoming more tolerant to it or because my illness has been getting worse.
Last night I took my pill at midnight, was in bed by 1230 and woke up in agony at 0100. So I probably got 15 or 20 minutes worth of sleep before the pain got too much again.
I've been using over the counter strength pills up till now, which is nothing. I have the same pills from the doctor and they are four times as strong. In a couple of days I'll start using the stronger ones, cut in half and that means I'll be doubling today's dose.
I expect an improvement but not for long. And so will begin a rollercoaster journey through the opiates, a cold war between the pills and the pain.
A cold war I'll be losing.
But no sleep is difficult to deal with and severe pain is debilitating and so, I suppose, I'll have to give in to it all.
Which is not something I take kindly to.
Who knows, I may try a bit of 'jiggling around' too.
No point in being predictable. That's boring.
(a don't stop till you drop production)
Contact me: neilwith firstname.lastname@example.org