Things are gonna get worse, Nurse!

The last month has been grim - the last week even grimmer.

None of that was helped when I saw Dr Feelgood a fortnight ago and although my bloods had improved a bit they hadn't improved enough.

You could see the disappointment on Dr Feelgoods face.

Not good.

Today I got an unexpected e-mail from Dr Feelgood. My bloods from a fortnight ago came in and they improved again.

I'm not celebrating (they are still horrendous - truly horrific) but I'm Ok for another month.

I'm still in the ring, still fighting.

I thought I'd celebrate with a poem from one of my favourite poets; John Cooper Clarke.

I should say that his 'Evidently Chicken Town', is a strong candidate to be played at my funeral. You can check it out on YouTube but I warn you it's a leetle bit sweary and it's hard to find a version where Cooper Clarke speaks the words properly.

And they are very important!

It says it all for me.

But this is for today - 'Things are Gonna get Worse, Nurse!'

Which sums up how I react to blood tests these days.




What me worry? I should care,
Shit for brains, wire for hair,
I’ve seen the future and I ain’t there,
Things are gonna get worse.

Velcro slippers and a spandex wasteband,
Washed up on Planet Wasteland,
Zipped up like a nylon spaceman,
Things are gonna get worse.

Things are gonna get worse, nurse,
Things are gonna get rotten.
Make that hearse reverse, nurse,
I’m trying to remember everything that I’ve forgotten.

Things are gonna get worse nurse,
things are gonna get crappy,
colour me perverse nurse,
bad news always makes me happy.

Things are gonna get worse nurse,
things are gonna get dismal,
smite me with a curse nurse,
make it something real abysmal

Things are gonna get worse nurse
I ain’t optimistic
I’ve got a mouth like a purse nurse
and a bungalow smelling of piss and biscuits

things are gonna get worse nurse,
murder by statistics,
take me back to the first verse,
the last ones just too pessimistic

Euthanasia – that sounds good,
An Alpine neutral neighbourhood,
Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood,
Things are gonna get worse.

By John Cooper Clarke.

Neil Harris
(a don't stop till you drop production)
Home: helpmesortoutstpeters.blogspot.com
Contact me: neilwithpromisestokeep@gmail.com