A couple of years back, when I was low I used to walk amongst a group of semi-wild horses who were being kept nearby.
I would give them carrots and they would run around me, fighting and kicking out at each other.
Hooves flying out, it was very exciting; like running with the bulls. I guess it replaced some of the thrill of life that was missing after I got cancer.
As time went by the owners bred them quieter and got rid of the wildest ones - that happened within a year and the thrill was gone.
Nothing would ever replace the thrill of being in the front row of an amazing gig in a small pub (Robyn hated it!) watching a band full of fury.
This is the audience watching The Lagan (Celtic Punks) playing the last ever night at The Hob;
Now it's all going to be different and I need to find a different life - do something significant, something important. something that matters.
You don't get many second chances in life and this is my second.
We'll see what happens!
(a don't stop till you drop production)
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